Whimsical, Magical, Fantastical Dreams

When we are little, adults ask us frequently, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Answers range from firefighters to astronauts to princesses to dinosaurs. I remember drawing in this book I had, which prompted me to create certain things, myself as an artist: a paintbrush in one hand and a mixing pallet in the other. When I got a little older, I discovered painting was harder than I thought and turns out I am probably not the next Van Gogh or Picasso. My dreams changed, author this time. I tried writing but 13 hand-written pages into my “book,” I realized that it would probably not be the next New York Best Seller. Marine Biologist, singer, teacher, zoologist, movie producer, and everything in between filled my childhood.

Then, I grew up. Physically I stopped growing, but when does one exactly transition between being a child and an adult? Legally I am considered an adult at age 18, but I am given the right (if I pass a test) to man a metal machine that could easily kill someone if I am not careful at age 16 yet I am not allowed to drink alcoholic beverages until I am 21. Scientists have come to the conclusion the brain stops developing when humans are 24 years old, but when does our brain stop maturing? I’m not sure it ever does. There is no definitive time in one’s life where you are grown up and when you are not because there is nothing like the feeling of returning home and laying your head upon your own pillow or running through the sprinkler during a hot summer day. And as we age, our wisdom grows, but our childish longings never leave us, only become more subdued. When you are a kid, there is some magic line you cross once you “grow up,” but the fact that it does not exist makes the question of what I want to be when I grow up much harder to answer.

I have some ideas what I want to be. Some are fantastical and reserved for only dreams while others are much more attainable. I dream to be an ambassador for my country, to be able to help facilitate international relations for the UN, or to translate between countries in the world. I dream to be a polyglot, speaking languages like Spanish, French, Portuguese, German, Dutch, Arabic, Hindi, and etcetera. I dream to be a renowned photographer and explorer, sharing my adventures in one or two issues of National Geographic during my lifetime of how I climbed mountains or ventured through the rainforest or maybe simply sat down and had a meal in a foreign land.

Recently, I have discussed my future with two of my friends who are also on exchange, one of whom wants to be an ocean geologist and the other an archaeologist. My immediate reaction was to tell them how interesting and amazing their dreams are! Mine pale in comparison! They reminded me of being a little girl again, having wild dreams of doing something unique and unordinary. I explained to one how I wished to be an ambassador because a professional photographer is unattainable. “Be optimistic… If you really want it, you CAN get the job,” she told me. How odd a response. As an 18 year old girl, living in Spain who just figured out where she would like to pursue college, I am used to being told that I must go after a career that makes money, something that will use my intelligence, and I can have for a long time. Being encouraged by a peer that I need to hold fast to my dreams so they don’t slip away is an experience I have not had the pleasure of having in a long time. Although her words were simple and kind, it reminded me that with perseverance and hard work, anything is attainable.

When we “grow up,” where does our imagination go? Why does it limit ourselves and make the world less whimsical? Perhaps, reality taints it or others tell you that you need to stop living in a made-up realm. Our doodles as children becomes more realistic when we are older and we find ourselves drawing cubes or rain drops instead of dragons or mermaids in the margins of our notes. Sometimes we forget how to dream while we sleep or if we do, it is about menial things. Our creativity is suppressed to the point of minimal existence. Those who have grand imaginations and dreams stick out in society: they dress differently, they have an abnormal shade of hair color, their opinions are different, they don’t stick to the status quo. Labels are easily put upon them and the price they pay for an active imagination is not fitting in. Their doodles are abstract, they dream of creating what they love as their dream job even if it means not making much money, and they are joyful people. They tell amazing stories, ones that are true and others that they make up off the top of their heads. Yet, somehow they are the ones labeled as weird or get whispered about. They are living exactly how they want to be though: doing what they love, which is the only thing that matters to them.

For now, I won’t settle with doing something uncreative. I am an artist, but not of paint, of dreams. And it is my career in life to bring these dreams to life as would a painter paint an idea to canvas. Maybe I will be a photographer or an ambassador, maybe not. Whatever I do, I will do because it makes me happy and it keeps the embers of my warm imagination glowing, ready to be heated up into a blazing fire again.

*Polyglot: someone who speaks 4 or more languages

**I took the picture of the boat on the beach today (crazy weather the past few days)

I wanted to start sharing some of my thoughts that I write down during my exchange and perhaps give a deeper glimpse of what goes on in my head, more than the updates of what I do with my time or a recent trip I took. My creativity this year has skyrocketed since I have minimal outlets for it, so my doodles are more extravagant, I play my guitar a ton, I write (all the time,) and will soon be buying some paint to have fun with.

Thanks for reading!

COLLEGE: Update 3

WHO WANTS TO BE A GOPHER?! I DO!!

Yes, you heard it here, I finally decided that my next year (and hopefully all my years at college if they go well) will be spent at the University of Minnesota - Twin Cities. And I could not be more excited. As of right now, I want to study international relations with a concentration in Spanish but also study Portuguese, French, and Arabic. That's a little gustsy, I will admit... But these languages are perfect for me to learn with international relations! Why? 

1) My Gallego knowledge has helped me so much that I now can read friends' blogs in Portuguese.

2) If I know Spanish, Portuguese, and French, I know the main languages of the Americas.

3) If I know Arabic and French, I know a good portion of the official languages in Africa.

4) If I know Arabic, I know the official languages of the Middle East (a very important region nowadays.)

5) If I know Spanish, Portuguese, and French, I know the official languages of a block of Western Europe countries (not to mention English is pretty important too over there.)

6) International relations can involve traveling and speaking other languages (two of my favorite things!)

There is a whole list of reasons that I could say why I decided to be a Gopher, but I have made too many lists about this to even want to type it out. You can ask my best friend Sarah, we have Skyped more in the past 2 or 3 weeks about college than in our first 3 months in Europe. Nevertheless, I feel so good about this decision and I love it more and more every day! It is a weight lifted off my shoulders and I now feel like I have a better purpose for motivation!

If you have any more questions, comments, etc. etc. just let me know via comments or Facebook or email!

Ciento

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Ashlyn Kriegel who was instilled with a love of the world and Spanish language so much that she decided to live in Spain for almost a whole year. Now, this year wasn't easy for her, it was in fact filled with many trials. She had to overcome language barriers, make new friends, and live with complete strangers. At times she felt hopeless and lonely, that she would never fit in. But Ashlyn never gave up, and with each new day she lifted her head once again and said, "Today is a day I can take hold of and I will make it amazing." Granted not every single day was amazing as her first week in Spain, but little occurrences made each day special. Sometimes it was a friend giving her a hug, other times it was almost scoring a goal in soccer practice. Despite feeling setback sometimes, Ashlyn was constantly empowered by God. One evening, she was given a burning desire to be in fellowship, as that is something God placed in every single one of our hearts. So she acted upon it, organizing a group of other exchange students around the globe to participate in a morning/night of worship via Skype. They were called S.A.L.T. Separated Abba Loving Travelers. Although getting everyone together didn't work out like it was planned, Ashlyn discovered that the same longing for worship and to be with other Christians was also felt between other S.A.L.T. members. Now, Ashlyn did not feel alone. Hope now greeted her every morning and gave her motivation to pursue her life in Spain. THE END.

Well, that was my short little "fairy tale" and I can't believe I have made it all the way to 100 days. What a blessing. A quick recap of other things that have been happening in my life: played in two soccer matches (lost both,) had a guitar concert, and it's the first time in 6 years I haven't taken a final in school.

Recently, I have been going through another bout of loneliness (something I endured in October for three weeks,) but was completely comforted today when I opened up my "Jesus Calling" devotional book (for the first time in a few weeks I should add.) 

December 17
Come to me with your gaping emptiness knowing that in Me you are complete. As you rest quietly in My Presence, My Light within you grows brighter and brighter. Facing the emptiness inside you is simply the prelude to being filled with My fullness. Therefore, rejoice on those days when you drag yourself out of bed, feeling sluggish and inadequate. Tell yourself that this is a perfect day to depend on Me in childlike trust. If you persevere in this dependence as you go through the day, you will discover at bedtime that Joy and Peace have become your companions. You may nor realize at what point they joined you on your journey, but you will feel the beneficial effects of their presence. The perfect end to such a say is a doxology of gratitude. I am He from who all blessings flow!

Although I am prone to wander into the darkness that beckons me away from God and makes me feel like I am trapped in a downward spiral of sadness, God does not allow me, a beloved child, to stay there for long. 

I have also discovered the the one thing I miss most from home is Westwood and going to church. I watch the podcasts on Youtube every week, but I cannot wait to run into my home, my church, again. There is a saying "Home is where the heart is" and I gave a brief talk to middle schoolers this summer about what that phrase means. I challenged them to ask themselves where their homes were and if they were in God. Leaving my physical home, my spiritual house of God, and everything familiar that I called home, I now understand my own words in much more depth. My home rests in the hands of God because that is the only home I can rely on to never change, always bring me comfort, and have an unlimited outpouring of love. 

~Ashlyn

3

Here we are again, another month later. I can't tell if that is a good thing or bad thing right now. Another month of practicing Spanish, doing sports, making friends, going to school, and adventuring in the world. Another month closer to when I go home. But I won't be going home until at least the end of June or July you might say. This is true, but if my first three months passed this quickly already, then the next six or seven I can imagine will come just as quickly, if not faster. I am not going to think about that right now... So onto what I have done recently!

Mmmmmm... Homemade empanada, guacamole (courtesy of Xenia and me,) and some veggies! 

'MURICA!! YEAH! Xenia and I folded all the napkins to look like bananas! Only took us 45 minutes...

Left to right: Katie, Hope, Xenia, me

All the exchange students! Left to right: Eric, me, Hope, Xenia, Katie, and Max (Connecticut.) Max is part of a different program, but he came to have dinner with us as well! 

Look at how colorful the train station is!! Love riding the trains here!

So Thanksgiving happened, and I went to Vigo to spend the weekend with my exchange friends since I wouldn't be alone and not feast! Maybe I was just imagining it, but I did seem to get oddly hungrier that weekend... For the most part, I helped set up, do light cooking, eat and eat and eat and eat, watch some Doctor Who and then go home. Remember when I started off this year with terrible luck traveling? (If you don't, check out my Consuegra video blog post from the beginning of my exchange.) Well, you guessed it, my traveling luck has failed me yet again. My host mom's car broke on Sunday so she would not be able to pick me up from A Coruña. In lieu of that, I changed my train ticket so I left two hours earlier, was picked up by a friend in A Coruña who got me to the bus station, took a bus from A Coruña to Ferrol, found ANOTHER bus stop in Ferrol, took that bus to Cedeira, and finally arrived home. I left Vigo at 3:45PM and walked into my house at 10:00PM. WHAT A LONG DAY.

This week starts finals week at school, but hey, I already graduated so I will only be taking the English final. This means I get to sleep in for two extra hours every day but 1 day for the next week and a half. I also don't know what to do with myself this week because it is the first year since sixth grade that I have not taken a final... How does one "relax"? When I relax, I usually sleep a lot, and I don't think that is how you are meant to relax... Especially considering the beach is 5 blocks from my house... I should mention though, it only is about 40ºF-50ºF outside this time of year. Minnesotans react by saying, "that's nothing! We have snow and cold!" and when I checked the forecast last night, it is only supposed to be 0ºF this weekend. However, the cold here is really humid as well as windy so when you get cold, no matter how many layers you wear, you are still cold.

This weekend I will also be playing in my first soccer game in about 12 years. Never ever in my life time would I have thought I would be playing in a Spanish soccer match. I am no good at soccer! I haven't played in so long! It will be an experience, and I can't wait! My coach just tells me to have fun, so that is really what I do all of practice. This means I laugh at my mistakes often and just go on the field to enjoy myself rather than winning since I just am not that great of a player! I am making awesome friends in soccer and I adore being a part of a team since running is such a solitary sport and it reminds me of my rugby days, where we all had to work together, communicate, and operate as one machine (not individuals.)

As of yesterday, I was accepted into the University of Minnesota - College of Liberal Arts! Yayayayayayayayayayay!!!! 

It is high up on my list of colleges and now I wait to hear back from 3 more and begin filling out any/all scholarship applications... But at least I am going to college and at the very minimum, somewhere I love and with lots of people!

Update: My dad just Whatsapped me and sent me a picture of my acceptance into University of Northwestern St. Paul! WOHOO!

And, the most exciting news, in my opinion at least, is I am organizing a worship/fellowship night via Skype for my Christian exchange student friends around the world!! EEEEEEEE!!! (That was my squeal of excitement.) I CAN´T SLEEP I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS!!! My fingers hurt because I keep practicing my guitar so much for the songs we will do, and AH!! God gave this deep desire to be with others and worship Him with them, so He told me to make it happen. We have the technology and I have a guitar, so what was stopping us?! I decided to give us a cool name so "We are the SALT of the Earth" and SALT stands for Separated Abba Loving Travelers. Witty, right? Needless to say, they are excited, I am excited, and God is great. I also have begun to read my Bible diligently with my friend Lauren in Minnesota... Wow. Have I been missing out on life. I am learning so much and we are only on our second book! If you can't tell, I am on this God high right now: I am filled to the brim with joy and excitement for life and everything He has to give to me! I know these highs don't last forever, but usually they only happen once a year at summer camp time, yet I have learned that I don't need to rely on a camp to see God in a new way or feel like He is actually here with me without having to remind myself too much of that ever so important fact.

~Ashlyn